It was a perfect summer’s day as my family and I walked on the cobblestone streets in Old Quebec. We were having a fabulous time, the kids were excited to explore the unique alleys, stairwells and shiny black cannons. I was delighted with the rich history, European inspired architecture and bright colored homes. The local artists were proud to show their works of art, and musicians were on every corner playing French folk songs on their fiddles. We soon arrived at the Plains of Abraham, a beautiful park that gives a spectacular view of the St. Lawrence River. My youngest son, Ryan, was ahead of us joyfully running in circles and doing all the comical things that an active three-year-old would do. Now, don’t ask me how this next event happened, but suddenly he fell and went rolling down a steep hill. My heart skipped a few beats; by chance my husband was close enough to run and grasp him before an unfortunate event occurred. Once Ryan was safely in his father’s arms, he took a deep breath and, although he was somewhat shaken with a few tears streaming down his little face, he was fine. Seconds later he was off playing; I was still catching my breath.
We all go through challenges, they are part of life. But, some events can leave us feeling powerless as though we went tumbling down the steepest hill and hitting the bottom so hard that we are under the impression we may never get back up again. Through my own difficult moments, I learned the importance of building resilience. The journey itself was a challenge as I had to change my way of thinking. The brain resorts to familiar patterns which often prevents growth unless we push past the pain, the fear and the unknown, trusting that we’ve got what it takes to stand strong once again.
Resilience is the ability to adapt well in moments of stress, trauma, relationship problems, health issues, etc. This is not a trait, it is a learned behavior. We must summon the courage to rise above the circumstances and not let adversity define who we are. This does not mean resilient people will not go through rough waters, but they are able to navigate through every storm with clarity and compassion. Resilient people take responsibility for their choices, understand the value of difficulties and trust in positive outcomes.
It takes work to build strength, but it gets easier with each new lesson. Here are ways to start creating resilience in your life.
- Defining your core values
- Having faith in God
- Getting back up when you tumble
- Asking for support when needed
- Reinforcing inner strengths
- Learning from failures
- Increasing positive thoughts
- Seeking good relationships
- Enjoying life and laughing
- Breathing deeply to obtain inner calm